Moving into Trust

I returned from Switzerland after a lengthy, exhaustive, and expensive trip to mold in my Oakland, California apartment. My carpeting had been cleaned the end of June, and unfortunately with toxic chemicals and a delinquent water extraction process. Does it make sense to put water on carpeting? Does it make sense to even have carpeting in the first place?

My first glimpse of mold came from symptoms— a sore throat, slightly compromised respiration, and irritated nasal passageways. My property management company had already agreed to have a non-toxic carpet cleaning company redo my carpeting. Due to the chemical residue on top of the carpeting, I always wore shoes in my apartment. One day when I walked barefoot briefly, I felt dampness in the rug. After a careful inspection, I discovered many damp places throughout the carpeting. Moisture, especially contained moisture without ventilation, is an extremely fertile environment for mold growth.

I expressed absolute dismay to the property management company, especially given my health status and that mold is a neurotoxin. I researched mold, its health effects, and mold abatement. A mold test confirmed the presence of mold, especially underneath the carpeting (less than an inch of carpeting was lifted to acquire the sample since mold spores go airborne through picking up the carpeting). The property management company offered to move me to another apartment temporarily. After removing all of my belongings from the apartment, the suggested process for mold abatement included air filters, protective gear for workers, plastic liners in the worksite, carpet and padding removal and containment inside the apartment, floorboard treatments, wall treatments, another mold test, and more. Mold is the new lead and asbestos. It is deadly.

I had countless other problems in my apartment since signing a one year lease for tenancy beginning June 15, 2007. Most of all, I could not live in a building with a serious health hazard. Even with thorough mold abatement, I did not imagine myself feeling comfortable in the apartment, including with new carpeting that off gases more toxic chemicals.

Despite the charm of my apartment, I knew I had to move. After intensive email exchanges with the property management company, they agreed to let me break my lease. I then engaged in a 24/7 apartment search. I did not know if I would be able to find a new apartment quickly enough, and risked having to put my belongings in storage.

I moved out of my apartment with a small suitcase, two bags with work and administrative files, as well as a grocery bag of my Paracelsus home care protocol. I stayed with family friends Irene and Peter for two days, and then my friend Daniela in her new home for 10 days. I tried to remain calm and trust life. I also tried to work during this time, but mostly unsuccessfully. I could not see straight in moments. One day was so stressful that I would not have eaten if Daniela did not feed me. I definitely got by with a little (or a lot) of help from my friends.

I physically looked at apartments in the East Bay and North Bay. I considered apartments in San Francisco, but due to cost and location, nothing was appealing. I kept faith that life would show me where I needed to live.

I could have done without the stress, and lost productivity with my business. At the same time, I learned many valuable lessons and acquired new insights during my short-term housing crisis. The episode really allowed me to see myself, including how I handle chaos. And how I need to let go of my desire to control.
With absolute triumph, and a lot of hard work, less than one week ago I moved into a wonderful, charming, delightful, and surprisingly inexpensive studio apartment (with hardwood floors) in Sausalito with majestic views! I look at my home and surroundings, and I’m reminded to trust life!